Monday, November 13, 2006

I have made a very depressing discovery. Elmo toys are a one off. Apparently, each year, the Elmo factory churns out the latest talking, dancing, laughing Elmo, example being Tickle Me Elmo from a few years ago. The Elmo factory people may never make Tickle Me Elmo again. Ever. So, right now every E-Bay seller is being kept awake each night dreaming about what they will do with the fortune they rake in from selling Tickle Me Elmo for outlandish sums to fools like me.

In the below clip, you can see the resident hound figures the hysterical Elmo is another reason to dig up the back garden. My cat (RIP), was not such a big fan of my Elmo. Ian bought me the Hawaiian one, which does the limbo, rolls around and sings a rather fetching little tune. Whenever I let Elmo do this 'thang', the cat would recoil in horror, attempt to kill him and when he showed no signs of going to the Pearly Gates, she would sit in disgust, turn her back to him and hiss.

Aaah yes, Elmo, a treat for all the family.
Tickle Me Elmo X TMX Elmo

I have discovered that it it more exhausting to pretend to be working than it is to actually be working. It is more exhausting to try to drag out an activity over an hour than to it is to get it done in 10 minutes.

At this rate of going I could actually turn into a workaholic!


Saturday, November 11, 2006


This evening I went to see Borat with some friends and what a cinematic experience it proved to be. I had tried to avoid reading reviews prior to viewing, but curiosity killed me. I caved in and indulged in perusing the Times and was shocked that one of the primary, notoriously fickle critics, Cosmo Landesman, granted it an unheard of five stars. I was intrigued that it had received such rave reviews, considering that Borat himself has always been a rather controversial character, and so was keen to see what all the 'kerfuffle' was about.

To cut short what could be a really long personal opinion, all I have to say is, it must be seen. It is hilarious, offensive, shocking, eye opening , jaw dropping and everything that one would expect from a Sacha Baron Cohen creation. It is no holds barred. It is vulgar. It is horrifying, but above all, it is an entertaining, well made piece of cinema.

However if you are offended by those that mock or insult, Kazakhstan, homosexuality, Jews, gypsies, Americans, feminists, Evangelicals, politicans, black people, white people, fat people, right wing individuals, terrorism, Hitler, or Pamela Anderson, you might want to opt for something Disney made.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

My brother doesn't seem to realise that we have to pay for gas and electricity in the real world. I have lost track of all the times that I have come home to find all the lights on, gas on , windows open and all sorts of media appliances running at the same time. This evening is a fine example. I returned from work to find the lights on in every single room, even though he was lying on the couch in the living room, the heating on, with all doors and windows open, the shower on to build up steam to decrease his shirt, and the iron on even though it wasn't being used ( seeing as the waste of water and gas was already taking care of his shirt).


Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Why won't the sentences on my below post align correctly? Is this a sign that I am supposed to go Beta? I would, if I knew what on earth Beta was.
I've decided I want a pet. A real pet. None of that robotic stuff for me. However, seeing as I am not home enough and rather lethargic about cleaning up their 'mess', I may have some obstacles to overcome.

Dog- might as well get a child instead considering all the minding they require, what with extended walks, mountain sized bags of feed, poop walks, playtime, attention time, hug time, pat time, fetch time, bath time so on so forth
Cat- good to leave on their own, but bad when one returns from a day of work and is greeted with toilet roll shredded confetti style on the bathroom floor. One is forced to reconsider ones
thoughts. Also, cat litter stinks.
Budgie- the constant tweeting would drive me to feed it to the above cat
Turtle - would freeze to death here. Damned if I am buying all the fancy schmanzy equipment
to keep the thing alive. Enough of a struggle to keep myself warm.
Fish - Ian has fish. I forgot to feed them on many an occasion, or, to compensate, over fed
them, ( fussy little critters) and moaned when we had to clean the bowl. Plus they aren't any
fun. The dont do tricks, apart from the 'belly up' one.
Reptile things - vomit
Pony- always wanted one, but I think the Building Management ladies might have a negative comment or two about a little Sheltand 'mowing' the patch of grass some developer had the nerve to call a garden.
Hamsters- They die at an early age..........perhaps the constant running on a wheel is akin to the human stress test. Weeds out the weaklings. Mind you, I couldnt deal with the weekly grief.

The real thing does not appear to be a viable option.

However, this is!

It's genius. It even hisses if its tail is pulled. What a wonderful lesson to teach young and impressionable children