Just A Spoonful of Sugar..

There are 8 teaspoons of sugar in a single 330ml can of Coca Cola sold in Ireland and Great Britain.

Not sure if Americans have it better. They don't have sugar, instead creating dental cavities with High Fructose Corn Syrup.

And people wonder why their teeth are rotting and falling out of their heads. Tsk Tsk

The Gee Gees





Even though I tutted tutted at all those crazy people placing ill advised bets on horses last week, Friday saw me cave in. I didn't have any tips or any hunches, instead I spent the morning reviewing the form for all horses in the Gold Cup and decided that seeing as the favourite was a guarannted winner, ( with silly short odds), there was no point in putting my €10 on him. Instead, i went for an each way bet on Exotic Dancer, (see above), sent the facilities guy to the bookies on his lunch break, huddled around the radio at 3.30 and nearly peed my pants when he came in second. I had wisely placed an each way bet, ensuring some return on my bet. While my winnings were small, nothing could wipe the Cheshire Cat like grin off my face. I am beginning to understand the addictive side to gambling

I should NOT be allowed anywhere near a store anymore. Really. I went into town on my lunch break to mail a letter and like a moth to a flame was drawn into the Debenhams 25% sale. In I went, a woman on a misson and emerged 10 minutes later weighed down with half the cosmetic department and my wallet quite a little lighter. It was a shopping blitz, never seen before. I bought stuff I will NEVER use. Granted the shampoo and face wash will come in handy, but the sea salts and cherry bubble bath will take pride of place in the dungeons of my closet. Of course, once I started I couldn't stop and went into a clothing store where I just HAD to buy another pair of linen trousers. The fact that is is bitterly cold and pouring rain each and every day will not deter me in wearing them.

The Cheltenham festival is on this week. The week when people who have never seen a horse in their lives declare themselves racing experts. I have chosen not to indulge in the frenetic betting, but not so for some of the people I work with, if the screams of "Gwanyabloodynag" are anything to go by during race times. Lunch hour sees a mass exodus as they all take off to the local bookies to torment the teller with €1.00 bets from 15 people on the nag that just missed the slaughterhouse by a hoof, but may have a chance according the brother of the cousin of the sister of the neighbour of the girl at the next desk.

Only one more day until Casino Royale is available to buy. Daniel Craig goodness. Yum.

Canada


J'arriverai au Canada le 5 mai. Pour honorer la deuxieme langue du Canada j'ecris en francais. Je serai dans les banlieues de Toronto avec mon ami, Ian. Qui sait ce que je ferai! Peut-etre je balayerai les rues. Ce n'est pas reellement drole...........

Irish Stew


I have noticed on a few blogs and websites, North Americans discussing the making of Irish stew for St.Patrick's Day. I just so happen to have the definitive Irish Stew recipe and am willing to share.

Ingredients-
Some choice alcohol with Irish bar setting
Lemon
Salt
Cheese and Onion Taytos
Poitin

Utensils -
Neverending supply of glasses ( plastic advisable towards the end of the stew)
Chair with back and arms
Stainless Steel Bowl
Bounty Tissue
Taxi
Money
Lighter
Trained medic


1. Take an average Irish bar, fill to capacity with eager drinkers.
2. Provide pint sized glasses for required numbers
3. To each glass pour one part whiskey to 5 parts Guinness
4. Mix, cool and consume
5. Vigorously shake drinker
6. Once the Guinness-whiskey mix has fermented add one shot of green vodka
7. Allow to settle
8. While drinker is settling prepare one shot of black zambuca with flame ( glass optional, drinkers open mouth preferred)
9. Pour shot into open mouth, ignite, heat and swallow. Cheers encouraged.
10. Allow drinker to cool.
11. An optional spicy addition for the caliente lovers is one shot of finest Mexican tequilla.
12. Prepare drinkers arm with highest quality salt, pour shot of tequilla (worm suggested for added nutrients) and finish with a lemon garnish
13. It is suggested at this point to provide a stainless steel bowl for bodily evacuations. Toilet trips forbidden due to potential loss of valuable seat in busy stew.
14. While drinker is simmering, open a packet of finest Irish Taytos, place on a bed of Bounty, garnish with salt and serve
15. Take drinker off the boil and place on chair with back and arms. Cool.
16. Open a large bottle of poitin. Decant
17. Serve repeated shots of said drink until drinker begs for mercy.
18. Repeat steps 3-17 for as long as desired.
19. A side of Taxi optional
20. Trained medic necessary

Result
A delightful blend of alcohol soaked people with a hint of unwanted aromas and a bitter aftertaste.

Traditional Irish Stew is an accquired taste and does come with some unwanted side effects, but nothing a helping of Paracetamol, a bottle of Lucozade and a lie in can't cure

Want to buy some Irish Air?

I have to admire the entreprenurial skills of the Irish people. I am so jumping on the bandwagon. I have an endless supply of old jars and glasses. They are in need of filling. I'm off to the West of Ireland. Might not be back for days. But be sure I will come back a wealthy lady.... that or covered in seaweed... or found headfirst in a pool of cockles.

The Power of Picasa2

Before





After


Sometimes I amaze myself, but Picasa2 has knocked me out. I am off to doctor just about every picture I have ever taken.

I did NOT put that ridiculous header above, but there doesn't appear to be a way to alter it. The above pictures are some of my pictures from Asia. I do have pictures of other places but I haven't been able to locate the wire to load up pictures from the camera. Typical. Browsing through the my spaces and the bebos of complete strangers has its benefits as I managed to get a link to the site that makes my pictures do the collage effect. Whoo hoo!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

My preferred drink of celebration is champagne. So please do put some on ice as the Candadian High Commission have granted me a working visa.

Canada here I come.

So Sudan Red (yup, the cancer causing dye) has been found in some Asian chili powders. Food for thought for those of those that gorged on denjon jigae. And if ingesting Sudan Red isn't enough for South Koreans to handle, they are now being faced with an increasing suicide rate. It is being blamed on the widening divide between rich and poor. Correct me if I am wrong, but surely it is all to do with their emotionally opressive, indivdualism hating, forced family orientated society. Bah.

On the bus home I came up with a make cash slow scheme. Think about this, people from the age of 14-35 listen to their ipods frequently at alarmingly loud volumes. Therefore, by the time they are 65 (ish), they will have hideous aural abilities and will be in dire need of hearing aids. Anyone who owns or invests in hearing aid companies will be sitting on gold mines and wiping their bottoms with $100 bills. Of course it will only take a mere 30 years to accumulate even one bill to wipe your backside with.

You know when a cartoon character stubs their toe, it turns scarlet red, starts to pulse like a beating heart and turns into the size of a beach ball? I am currently sporting an imjury eeriely similar to that. I am the Foghorn Leghorn of the human world. I stubbed my third toe against the lap top that was lying on the floor on Friday night. It hurt like all hell. I had to do my best not to cry. It is now a palette of colours...none that blend all that well. Lots of black, with blues and reds, and a hint of yellow.

I am going for sympathy gold on this one.

On Friday evening I decided to treat myself to a nice bottle of red wine. Seeing as I am a member of the rat race, I tend not to question the price, more the quality of the wine and grape. However, I was brought kicking and screaming back to my church mouse university days when I overheard a trio of young college girls discussing the merits of the bottles of wine they were clutching. Each bottle they were holding had a value of about €6.00 so it was safe to say that if they bored of knocking back wine, they could use the remaining "alcohol" to remove paint from their bedroom walls. Instead they were animatedly comparing the alcohol percentages of each wine. They were torn between the 11.5% and they 12% bottles as the 12% was an extra €2. But, the brains of tomorrow cleverly deduced that if they spent a little more on the 12% bottle they would be more intoxicated therefore they would spend less on alcohol once they got into town later thatnight. You have to love the economics of an inpoverished mind.

My life has been so boring this last week

Sleep in
Get up
Shower ( only because society dicates so)
Take pills
Mope
Waste half my life on the internet
Take pills
Ingest baby food
watch crap on tv
Take pills
Ogle Ian on web cam
Stay up too late
Watch Ugly Betty reruns
Take pills
Go to bed

However, i did fit in a little shopping between taking my pills and ogling Ian.I bought clothes that have resulted in me spending the last day justifiying their purchase. I might as well look good justifying......

I had my wisdom teeth removed today. All four. I have zero swelling, bruising or pain. How strange. I'm sitting up, talking and taking in soft foods. Apparently once I came out of my anaesthetic I was full of the joys of life and had a great chat with the nurses. I was left in recovery for ages where I nearly went insane from boredom. I can only presume that the anaesthetic, painkillers and suppository combined completely numbed any potential pain. I am incapable of staying in bed during the day, so had a rather difficult time sitting in my recovery bed from 9am to 5 pm. Mind you, if I could, I would have an anaesthetic every 6 months. After anaesthetic, I feel so refreshed and relaxed. Perhaps I feel that way, as I go into the operating room all geared up for a long deep deep sleep. Nothing like it. However all the other people in recovery asked for injections to ease nausea and vomiting following their anaesthetic. Not power girl! Made of steel, me.

Today I went into the clinic wearing a hoodie, cargo pants, trainers, with no make up, spots all over my face and my ipod glued to my ears. I filled out my vitals on the medical report, handed it back only to have the nurse come back to tell me that I had made an error on my form. She didn't believe that I was 26. She thought I was about 17. How fabulous I thought, until I realised she probably thought I was still in my teens what with my spot ridden face and ipod blasting the latest from yer man Mika.

I am so depressed. I decided to take a look around some of the stores after work- try on a few things, see how the new clothing offerings work out on me. They don't. It appears one must be verging on an eating disorder to fit into half of what is on hangers. I refuse to give up food. I have far too important a relationship with it. Instead I shall craft something from a reusable shopping bag. I have oodles of them. Maybe I could even join the local knitting circle. I could enjoy tea with the old dears, get the low down on the best dentures out there, discuss who is the best looking in the local 70-80 year old male range, get my Sunday best out for Sunday service. The possibilites are endless. Mind you, I did buy a skirt in the Winter sales last weekend. A velvet wine number with green flower things embroidered on panels. It sounds rather disgusting, but it is quite the opposite. In fact it is a little ridiculous. I have no idea when or where I would even wear it. Perhaps that is why it was 70% off.......... they saw me coming.

Chuckle Chuckle.

For those of you that haven't been eating your recommended daily allowance of vegetables click on the Dilber cartoon to enlarge.

I noticed today that I haven't written very often in recent weeks. I have been a mixture of lazy and busy..... contradictions in themselves. Ian came to Ireland a few days after Christmas and stayed here for two weeks. We had a wonderful time, even if I nearly nagged him to an early grave. The company that I was temping with before Christmas have signed me to their name - a very positive move.

I would like to type some more but I when I return home in the evening, the last thing I want to do is sit down in front of another computer and type some more... mind you though I can now do that crazy typing - staring wide eyed at the screen , never glancing at the keys, tapping like a maniac while managing to type sentences word perfect. In the words of a Korean child, "Aaaazzaaaah".

I am also getting very lazy. My job requires that I sit for 6 hours a day. It is getting to the point where I complain about having to get off my chair to pick up a file. I know. I have also made a little foot rest from file boxes and have my chair angled perfectly to compliment said rest...... I am one doughnut away from Chief Wiggum status.

It's the Wild Wild West.

The Cliffs of Moher and the Burren.
Purty.

Igot bored and drew a Santa. Not a lot on TV at 2am.

Bah humbug.

Missed the staff Christmas knees up due to a cold.

Angry, am I.